First of all, thanks to those of you who wrote following my last piece on the car accident my daughters and I were involved in recently. Your kind and thoughtful words were much appreciated.
As for this week, I hope you’ll forgive the fact that my newsletter is a little late. This is because I was away for the weekend and wanted to write about it on my return.
Photo by Jovan Vasiljević on Unsplash
Last Friday, we went to stay with friends in the beautiful Georgian town of Bath. They live in the most exquisite house at the top of a lane in Widcombe, an area to the south east of the city and an easy 15-minute walk to shops, pubs and restaurants. The purpose of our visit – apart from seeing our friends, was to be among the first to enjoy the surround-sound, ultra-upmarket viewing experience of their newly installed cinema room and to play a few rounds of poker!
I am a keen card player but have never learned poker, despite my father trying to teach it to me one grim, rainy day in our caravan on the coast in Northern Ireland when I was about ten years old. My mother expressed some doubt about the wisdom of teaching an adolescent to gamble, even though we were only playing with bundles of matchsticks, but she needn’t have worried, for not one jot of what I learned that day stuck with me, so I arrived in Bath, to all intents and purposes, a novice.
As a result of my recent accidents and injuries, we have not ventured far from home for quite some time, so this was an exciting break from the fairly boring recovery routine I’ve been forced to observe. Our friends are among the movers and shakers who encourage, organise and support the vibrant music scene in Bath and we arrived on Friday evening just as several of them were gathering around the kitchen table to discuss some upcoming events over an early supper.
Then it was coats on and into town to watch a couple of promising acts at one of the many arts venues in the city. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say we were among the oldest people there, but we were not alone – I spotted a few other grey heads among the throngs of students and other young people and it was fun to stand in the dark and soak up the atmosphere.
The room we were sleeping in back at base has a huge bed with comfy mattress and a lovely view over the garden to the valley and hills beyond. The ensuite has a rain shower – it’s like staying in a boutique B&B - so I was more than happy to be tucked up in bed with my book by 11pm. One of the things I love about staying with friends for the weekend is that I barely have to think: beyond deciding whether I wanted a cooked or continental breakfast, I’m not sure I made another decision all weekend. Everything was mapped out for us.
After breakfast the next morning we walked into town in the sunshine, collecting another couple of friends and their cocker spaniel on the way. We were headed for a craft market – with its Christmas present buying opportunities, so I had cash and bank card at the ready and was able to make use of them pretty swiftly as we spent a relaxing hour or two browsing and chatting to artisan stallholders.
On the way back, a visit to The Bath Botanical Gin Company and Herbal Apothecary was a must, not just because of its name and charming shopfront but also to engage in a detailed conversation – and a tasting of course - about the contents of the varied bottles on display. I loved the stylish labels and green wax seals and as well as a bottle of their “Number One” gin for ourselves, I couldn’t resist one of their limited-edition gins, which come in a stone bottle, called “Mothers Ruin”. I have a friend who I feel sure will appreciate the moniker and thoroughly enjoy the contents.
It was most pleasing the have secured four presents in a morning and now it was time to settle ourselves in for the afternoon’s state-of-the-art home cinema experience. It didn’t disappoint and we emerged three hours later blinking into the light to get ready for dinner with various courses contributed by the group of friends who were arriving for the poker night. As we ate, I kept warning everyone that I didn’t know how to play poker but they all assured me I’d pick it up in no time.
We each put the agreed sum into the pot, the chips were allocated, cards dealt and we played a trial round so I could get the hang of it. A little clearer but still unsure what I was doing most of the time, we played the first proper round. I won! The cards were dealt again. By some fluke, I won again. “Beginners luck” I assured everyone. Three more rounds in I won once more. My chips were stacking up and the others were now looking sceptical and asking “Are you sure you haven’t played before?”.
The evening continued to go well for me until I made a few bad judgements and was outfoxed by those more knowledgeable and better at maintaining a poker-face than I, resulting in a good lesson to this would-be gambler when I lost everything in the end. But it was great fun and I’m keen to be a part of the next poker night.
We headed home the next day after a cooked breakfast and fond farewells and, once back, I began thinking about the friends who are coming to visit us in the coming weeks. I enjoy this experience just as much as going away.
One upside of my daughters having left home is that, at last, we have guest rooms. When friends come to stay, instead of having to rig up an inflatable mattress in the sitting room and worry about whether they are going to be warm enough, comfortable enough and feel they have enough privacy, we can now offer them a proper room of their own.
Both bedrooms were decorated while my girls were still living here, to upgrade them from teenager’s retreats to a stylish space for grown-ups. Whilst the girls were consulted to some extent, they were under no illusion that this redecoration was not being done solely with them in mind. Both rooms now have smart wallpaper and fabrics, comfy double beds with crisp white linen, plumped-up pillows, and a throw across the end of the bed.
I love the whole preparation of making friends as welcome as possible. I try to think of everything a guest might need: each room has a full-length mirror and a make-up mirror; I always check there is a hairdryer and I pile fluffy towels up on the chair, all the correct sizes to allow for baths, shower or just a cursory face wash. I put flowers in the room – most of the year round they are cut from the garden, in winter they’re shop-bought. There is a kettle, cups, a selection of teas and a jug of fresh milk so they can have a cuppa in bed before rising to join us for breakfast.
We have usually planned the weekend in advance – dinner cooked at home one evening, out at a local restaurant the next, long dog walk along the river with lunch at one of the pubs on the way and above all, plenty of time to chat and chill out too.
I relish the fact that I can now spend time thinking about and planning these joyous occasions rather than racing around to try to get everything done when I’ve been working all week. This, for sure, is one of the upsides of having more time on my hands since being retired.
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