Image by Markus Spiske on Unsplash
It’s supposed to be a relaxing pastime, yes? In fact, so much so, that there are charities, most notably Thrive, based on the premise that growing things is therapeutic and can promote positive changes for those living with ill health or disabilities. Well, I am going to go out on a limb here and state that in the 40 odd years that I have been a gardener, I rarely find it brings me calm. Pleasure? Yes. Satisfaction? Yes. Gratification? Yes. But calm? No.
I find it a constant battle. Against the elements and wildlife. Like farmers, gardeners want the rain to water their plot, but after a heavy downpour, everything sags and flops, so, one needs to be ultra-organised about staking and tying in plants as they grow, to keep them supported. And the wet weather, of course, brings the slugs and snails. Able to move much more easily across the damp ground, they are on the move almost as soon as it begins to rain. They are in my garden in their thousands – and I’m not exaggerating. I collect them at dusk and first thing in the morning and I can pick up 100 in one go.
When I gardened in Hampshire for 11 years, most of my plants were grown in stone chippings (it was an old Victorian railway station and the chippings were in keeping with the style of the property and its garden). We also had song thrushes, frogs, toads and slow-worms, all predators of slugs and snails, in the garden and were regularly visited by hedgehogs and badgers I assume consumed quite a few. As a consequence, I had zero issues with slugs as the stone chipping meant they couldn’t travel across the ground like they can on soil.
It was a shock when I moved back to a walled London garden where there are so many nooks and crannies for them to hide out. I had forgotten just how bad they can be with almost none of the beneficial creatures present to feast on them. When I plant out the Cosmos, Ammi majus and Dahlias that give me colour later in the summer, I have to be constantly vigilant as slugs can strip and destroy whole plants in a night.
I have shed real tears, of frustration and disappointment, about how the work I do is sometimes for so little reward. In the end, I often plant more than I need on the basis that I can then forfeit some casualties. “Why don’t you just grow plants the slugs don’t eat?” says my friend Darryl. “Like what, I respond?” Seriously, they eat almost anything in my garden except the roses. After a night’s rain I even have to pull them out of foxglove trumpets.
I decided to stop growing Hostas. As every gardener knows, they are martyrs to slugs and it’s just too much work to try to protect them. I was astonished once, on visiting a walled garden in Amsterdam that they had Hostas everywhere. “How do you avoid slug damage I asked them?”. I couldn’t believe their response.
They had taken everything out of their garden – every plant, all the soil – to get rid of slug eggs, they had had the tall walls repointed – to close up snail hiding places and had it re-landscaped with new soil. Then they had replanted with Hostas. Clearly, they must have liked the leafy plants but also, these town gardens with their tall walls were very shady and therefore limited in what they could grow. I wonder if their Hostas are still thriving: I’ll bet the slugs and snails have managed to find their way in somehow.
When we get a dry spell, I celebrate – the slugs and snails will be less of a problem. But then, of course, everything needs watering! I have stopped growing much in containers for this very reason. There is usually enough rain in spring to get the bulbs through their flowering period. Then in summer I mostly grow agapanthus in large terracotta pots as they can cope without regular watering. To keep my borders watered in long spells of dry weather, I have invested in a watering system and this has made a real difference to the amount of work involved in keeping plants happy during drought although, of course, the watering brings out the slugs and snails again……….
I am growing lilies in pots for the first time in many years, but I had completely forgotten about the dreaded lily beetle, until I spotted several of the scarlet insects on my plants. They eat the leaves stems, buds and flowers, but worse, if one doesn’t remove the beetles smartish, they lay their eggs on the underside of the leaves. These turn into disgusting reddish-brown, maggot-like grubs that cover themselves in their own black excrement (nice!) and, in turn chomp their way through the host plants.
If one is vigilant, at least the red beetles are easy to spot and to remove before too much damage is done, but beware, you have to tap them off into your hand pretty deftly before they realise what is happening: if they get wind of your presence they have an annoying habit of pivoting to the underside of the leaf making them trickier to catch or, worse still, dropping to the ground where they can hide – and then crawl back up the plant when your back is turned.
We have a lot of grey squirrels here, so I have grown used to covering my pots of bulbs with chicken wire to prevent the squirrels from digging up and carrying away the bulbs. This year, I experienced a completely new issue with these pesky acrobats. There is a flat roof above our bedroom and I hear them careering around above me in the early morning. They swing across from the cherry tree and then make their descent through the ancient wisteria that covers one side of the house. What I hadn’t realised, until my neighbour pointed it out, is that they are stopping on the way to strip the bark from the large, winding stems. I know they do a lot of damage in woodland but I’ve not been aware of this in my garden before. Only time will tell if this is going to damage the beautiful old climber.
When I am not dealing with the various pest’s campaign of destruction, the stress comes from the fact that there is always something else needing to be done. I am not very good at “taking time to smell the flowers”. As soon as I sit down to survey my handiwork, I spot a wayward rose shoot that needs tying in or something that needs dead-heading, and off I go again. In the 1980s, the late Mirabel Osler wrote a book called “A Gentle Plea for Chaos”, when, she said, gardening had taken over her life. Ah yes, I know that one: even the thought of going on holiday sends me into a flat spin, for who will patrol my plot and keep the pests in check when I’m not here?
Osler suggested that we stop trying to keep our gardens so regimented and instead let nature take over a little. I understand the premise but find it impossible to give up my drive to control it all. And that, I guess, is my undoing. My style of gardening has been influenced by visiting National Trust gardens where perfection always abounds: I have to remind myself they usually have a team of full time gardeners to keep it that way!
Do you find gardening stressful? I would love to hear your home truths too. If there is something you’d like to tell me, please leave a comment and I’ll respond
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Good Lord. I think you are fabulous. But it sounds like you need a break from your gardening life. Nothing here seems to hold your usual joie de vivre.
I love reading all your articles and this latest one made me chuckle! I do understand how you must feel when you work so hard to maintain your beautiful garden.... it must feel frustrating and exhausting to have to constantly battle the bugs and rodents! But...
think it might be an idea to create a little 'calm' area in your garden... a ' breathe, close eyes and meditate' spot?! 🙂
I recently attended an evening with Sheila Hancock at Richmond Theatre: amazing lady who implored us to 'Cherish the moment' and definitely really smell & savour the aroma of beautiful roses, flowers etc.
About the slugs... can small sharp edged landscaping stones be sprinkled around some areas of planting (recreating what you had in Hampshire) to deter slug travel I wonder? And a cider vinegar spray?
I do love gardening and whenever in our place in Italy, can spend days outside. Hard work but do find it also therapeutic and sometimes relaxing but maybe I like a less controlled and more wild space!